When Change is Scary

It brings fear, and tears, and bitterness, and anger, and a whole set of insecurities we (I) never knew we (I) had.

Unexpected change forces you to be vulnerable in a way you maybe haven’t been before. It forces you to ask for help. Something I’ve never been great at. But there has got to be something said about those moments of real, raw, true, vulnerability. It’s messy. But it’s the most beautiful thing on this earth if you ask me. Moments where people are truly, fully themselves. No facades of well-being. Just the honest to goodness truth and needs. There’s something sweet in our roughest moments, where people see our bare souls laid out to dry. Parched, and looking for companionship in the desert.

Unexpected change is a chance to kick and scream and thrash and yell, “BUT THAT WASN’T THE PLAN!!!!!!!” Cry. Get mad. Pout. Feel everything. Do what you need to do, and do what naturally comes out of the shock of it all. God made us humans of feelings, so take Him up on it.

Allow yourself to feel e v e r y t h i n g. Maybe for the very first time, if you’re being honest with yourself.

And then, after however many minutes, hours, sleeps, wake-ups, it takes you to come back to the surface, just stop for a moment. Stand really still. Wait. Like the sun, seconds before it rises, gracing the earth with its presence. Its light. Its beauty. Stand still and breathe in deep, expectant. And let Jesus, who was there all along, remind you of His Plan. His Goodness. His Strength- that you’re going to need in the coming weeks. or months. or years.

In the swirling madness that somewhat seems to resemble some form of your life, stop and stand still. Breathe. Ground yourself into the Earth as the created, beautiful one that you are. Stand with all of you, every little piece, opened wide in surrender to what He has for you. Because it’s good, my friend.

He has consistency. And love. And grace for the moments when you stomp your feet and yell that ‘This isn’t fair’ for the hundredth (or thousandth, let’s be honest) time. And hear him whisper to you, “But I am fair, and I’ve got you. Trust me.”

So when the change is massive, rearing its head in front of you like a bull, and snarling its teeth at you like a ravenous wolf, remember Whose plan this life was all along. It was never mine, and it was never yours. It was, is, and forever will be God’s. He is the most creative, most beautiful, most flavorful story teller, and we get to live out His most colorful and gracious penmanship, even if what He writes isn’t what we saw coming. Not by a long shot. What a gift. What a treat.

So, when change is something you didn’t choose and it seems undoable and wrenches your gut, let yourself feel it all. But then go out expectantly, bravely, boldly, and live out the most wonderfully intricate story that the Master Story-teller has crafted. Just. For. You.

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